Tomorrow

Photo Credit: Waynn Images

The morning has come when I have to face what I fear most. It was a new day, a new change. I remembered I was told by him that he is no longer having the same feeling for me back when how we've started. I still remember vividly how he tells me he was through with me during dinner time at his place.

I knew this was coming and I was so downcast that it was this soon. Again, I refrain from arguing with him because I do not see the point in it anymore. All I ever asked was,

"Is he good to you?" I asked sincerely.

His answer to me was cold and harsh,

"That, is no longer your concern. Anymore."

It hurts so much just to hear those words directly from him as the receiving end because I know my care for him have already been taken advantage of. I am just history to him.

I remember he used to yearn and beg for care when he needed it. He would usually asked for more when I was never ready. He will asks for things he think he wants and I'll be sacrificing all of those for him with no questions asked. Truthfully, I am a bore to him.

Now, I know he doesn't need me anymore.

He has been cheating on me ever since I can remember. I know but I never wanted to confront. He has been secretly texting a guy whom I've not met mutually. In retrospect, I'm being too complacent with our relationship, he dominates the entire relationship by meeting all his wants from me.

I do not demand for love like how he does it.

I do not beg for attention like how he asks for it.

I do not practice materialism like how he splurge it.

Surprisingly, what I'm going to miss most is, is his enthusiasm for life. He is always eager to try new things which brought colors to my life. He made me see things in so many different perspectives which no one I know is able to pull such energized stunt in a courtship.

It was 8.06pm and the feeling I had is not sadness. It's a feeling that I am over staying my welcome the minute he asked me to let him go. So, I asked emotionlessly,

"Are you expecting someone? I can pack all my stuff and you can see the last of me from today onwards."

"You don't have to be like that. Why do you always have to talk like that? There will be no one else coming to my place at all. Don't always sound like a know-it-all!" He sounded really defensive.

"Then I guess I'll pack then." I stood up, I know him too well.

"Damn it, Malcolm! Why do you always have to see through me?" He demanded. 

I closed my eyes and inhale a deep breath. Then I looked at him as I exhale,

"You tend to lie every time you want things your way. What makes this lie anymore different than the rest in which you have done before?"

"Then I suggest that you stay. Just to prove my innocence that no one will be coming." He fidget with his fingers around his cell phone. He never changes, he's betting on either his pride, ego or maybe himself.

"There is no need to prove anything. Not to me. I will just pack my stuff and leave. It is painful for me to even stay on here when clearly you do not want me to be around." I quietly move to his room and started packing.

*Door Bells Ring*. 

Just about time that I finished packing, and for some odd reason, he looks really pale.

He wasn't ready I suppose. As I walked out, he was trying to justify his actions again as he walks by to open the door. And here comes that person whom I've been longing to see.

His new lover.

"Oh hi! You must be..." He squinted his eyes and he was puzzled.

"Hi sir, I'm the help. I'm just trying to clean up the mess as soon as possible so that you two are able to enjoy the evening together." I interrupted abruptly when I noticed my ex-boyfriend's facial expressions.

"Wonderful! Honey, you didn't tell me you hired the help to clean up the house!" He was smiling towards my ex-lover with glittering eyes. "You always know how to surprise me even more, like everyday."

I've packed up my stuff and said to them,

"It's been a pleasure, sirs. Allow me to wish you both a happy evening together. I have to take these out."

"Thank you!!!" His new lover exclaimed.

I closed that door behind me. I wanted to cry so bad. And I heard him say,

"I forgot to pay him."

I quickly wiped off that little emotional tears that I shed and stand confidently outside waiting for the lift. He came running towards my direction and said,

"You didn't have to do that just now. You shouldn't have..."

"Goodbye, Justin. It's been a real pleasure knowing you. I will now move on with mine. And I hope we can still be friends even if we didn't work out as lovers." I hugged him. It was our last hug. A real hug. 

He is now officially my history.

"Friends. Definitely." He uttered with guilt.

Now, all of these seems like yesterday when I actually saw him walking towards my direction with a different partner again. The break seems like yesterday, but it feels like last week? Or was it last month? Has it been longer than that? Ha! I can't even remember how long was it anymore. He is no longer my pain. I have forgotten many of the events that he and I were together.

He was my lesson learned. He is my friend still because after all, he did smile at me while he passes me by. He is what made me new again. And by him making that decision to let me go, I have met my loving husband of 3 years and more (hopefully).

Tomorrow will always be a better day for me. Tomorrow is what I will always look forward for.

Tomorrow.