Our weekend

Photo Credit: Waynn Images

There he was, reading that Sunday newspaper right across me sipping his scorching hot coffee. We both like it black and sugarless. Scratching his tummy (previously packs) and started talking out loud,

"Honey, remember that shooting I was talking about? It seems like it's another case of bully victimization again."

I looked to him and smiled. He is so adorable when he talks about something that he's passionate about. He could get all emotional if you disagree with him just because his opinion withstand the rest whoever oppose him. And when he knows that you'd equally care about it too, his eyes will turned softer and steal a kiss from me with a gentle,

"I love you."

That itself, breaks me into pieces of sugar fairy dust. And to that, I could sprinkle my love for him too. 

Mama stayed over during the weekend with us, just to check on whether our groceries are all well stocked up before we welcome the winter season. As she was washing up some of our vegetables, he stood up and gave mama a hug and whisper something for her to know.

Mama started giggling, she turned towards my direction and said,

"You, my son, how could you bully him last night?"

"What have I done to bully him, Ma?" I questioned with a cynical smile.

"You're the one to talk, you've snatched off his blanket and left him naked on the bed all night long." 

She'd playfully lectures me in front of me. He standing by her side, with his brows so high and gave me the meanest look. I'm so gonna get him back.

"Nonsense, Ma! I did nothing of that sort. For all you know, he has been kicking me through the night and I did not even complain to either any of you." I just add on to my indirect complains with an attitude towards him.

They both burst into laughter when he brought out a jar of orange juice from the refrigerator and said to mama,

"Ma, come sit with us and talk. I don't want you doing all the work around here when clearly you're our special guest in this house."

He is so charming when he's all hospitable and so welcoming to anyone he enjoys a company with. Mama stops the washing and tap me on my shoulder just to clean off the excessive water off her hands and sat in between us and said,

"You know, I've always been wrong about you both. Dad would never understand the love you guys have for each other. Now that he's gone, I hope he can witness what I'm currently enjoying right now. The company of both very capable adults that truly understand the meaning of being for each other during this difficult time. I love you both very very much."

Mama was a little teary and continue,

"Promised me that you two stay faithful and loving for each other."

He looked at me while Mama was saying that to us. I remember he reminded me last night that I am irreplaceable. And I assured him that too. I hope what we've exchanged remains true until end of time. Mama continues,

"Also, you both are bound to love me, forever!" She giggles as she peak at us.

He and I took a glance with each other and quickly ran over to Mama and gave her the longest kiss until she screamed,

"Oh no... Stop! Gay men kissing me that hurts my cheek!"

We laughed as the oven ticks off with an alarm. Which means, our chicken pie is ready to be served. Mama uses a casserole dish to create that large chunk of pie like she's serving 20 people. I guess, her version of staying over is to sinfully glutton her way with us so that we could spend time and hangs out with her during this grieving period. It has been 3 months dad has passed. I think she needed a break from being alone.

He whispers to me,

"I think your dad will be so proud of you, no matter what the circumstances are. Stay strong with your mama, everything is going to be alright because I will be here for both of you."

And that itself makes me the happiest guy in the whole wide world. And that made me respond to him and said with an earnest heart,

"Honey, I love you."

We kissed.

Aradamis

Photo Credit: Waynn Images

I live by the sea for 23 years. My parents died here when I was 4 years of age. I am raised by 2 lovely souls with an enormous heart to care for my well-being. Their loved for me is border-less. They taught me everything I know about the sea. Often they asked, whether I still remember how my parents look like. I always shakes my head with an assuring no. This inkling in me often makes me think if my answer differs, it will break their heart so bad.

Every night, when they'd fast asleep, I will go by the edge of that dock just to stare blank at the darken horizon just to speak with my parents. Asking myself, will they ever recognize me? Will they remember my voice? Whom do I looked like the most? Are my hobbies similar with either of them? I will never ever know.

The occasional moonlight and starlight sparkling reflection through the surface of the seawater reminisce how mama sang that beautiful song for me. She always allows my toes to tingle just a little of that seawater just to make me giggle. I can never remember the words, but I'm able to hum along that sweet melodic music that makes me really joyful.

Here I am, my usual date in the dark, as the salty sea breeze gracing through my face, the humming of mama's music within me starts. I thought it was me but it's not. It felt like it was coming from within me. The humming was as low as my diaphragm tremors, and within minutes, there was a big splash on my right which taken me by surprise. And there was laughter... Joyful laughter... I've not heard before.

"Raphael! Turn around, I'm right beside you!" That voice exclaimed with excitement.

"Where are you? Who are you? How do you know my name? Is this some kind of joke?" The chill goes directly into my bones as I am trembling with so much fear. What is really going on?

"Raphael, Raphael... My dear Raphael, I've been watching you since you were small. How could I not know you?" That voice came back again on my left this round with lots of splashing sound.

"You're scaring me... I'm leaving. This is all a dream. A nightmare! I'm heading back!" I'm trembling with fear and I can't move away.

"No wait! Don't go! I'm your friend. Why are you afraid of me?" His voice is like inches away from my right side now and that endless splashing is really annoying.

"Friend? What are you? I can't even decipher what or who you are. I can't even see you." I questioned him.

The sudden burst of emerald lights and turquoise sparks with all that seawater splashes around me that caught me off guard. I stare directly into the voyage, and still, I'm searching for a creature of any sort that's able to fit that voice.

Photo Credit: Waynn Images

As the figure starts appearing, I just couldn't believe my eyes, he was standing majestically in front of me, fully nude. He's shining so bright which brought much more fear to me. So I boldly asked,

"Who... who... are you? And what... what are you?"

"Raphael, I'm a merman. And my name is Adamaris. You should already know me by now. That song you hum nightly is what brought us to you." That man said so with a voice so thunderous.

"Us? Who's us? What song?" I asking in a state of denial.

"That song your mother hums before she was taken away. We are your guardians from this ocean and you are one of us. I'm in my human form when I'm not part of the ocean, hence my transformation as a merman is when I touch the essence of this earth, the seawater." He explains.

"You... You know my mother?You know my parents? You know them? Can I see them? You do have special powers like what you did just now... I want to see them. I missed them so much, I missed them dearly!" I've lost all control when I say it, and when I knew I stopped, I was already kneeling down sobbing.

He came over to me to pick me up. And without a hint, he came by to kiss me on my lips and the world around me swirl violently and I can't hold on to that whirlpool of rush as I'm being brought to another dimension of time. It was so quick as he pulls his lips away from me and he uttered,

"I think that's enough for tonight."

"You've... You've just... Showed me my past. So much has happened. So much! I can't seem to take it in all at once. Why are you doing this to me? Tell me more, please" I am confuse and clear with so much truth being thrown to me all in one kiss. I couldn't comprehend the magical truth behind what Aradamis has done to me.

"You've just experienced the wonders of the ocean's secret. Of all the people I've known, you have that privileged for me to do so because you're part of us. Now that you've understand the reason behind your parent's departure, I want you to consider this wisely." He took a deep breath and continues, "that song is the royal emblem to our people in the ocean with the highest of respect. Use it for good as I will be watching you always."

"But that kiss..." I uttered something I thought I shouldn't.

"Yes, that kiss I gave you are both magical and personal at the same time. I hope you don't mind the twist towards the end." He giggled.

"Adamaris, I couldn't have thank you enough. I don't know what to say. Is this not a dream?" I blushed.

"Say no more!" As he hands out a necklace full of shining emerald pearls with pictures of my parents in it, and he says, "Raphael, this necklace is made by all of us and we want you to have it. Keep it as it will safeguard your heart with so much love and respect. Call me when you need me. I'm always a hum away."

He jumps back into the sea with a big splash of water covered me and in split seconds I saw him transformed into a full fledged beautiful merman. Shining still, he swam back beautifully into the deep. He turns back and waves goodbye towards my direction and swept off like a speed of light.

So, I thought to myself, I must be dreaming. Or I'm having a vision because this can't be it. It can't be it. A merman...? I'm delusional! I might have just fall into the sea and knock my head somewhere and got  myself thinking there's a merman in this world.

But what's within my hand that I'm holding. That sparkling necklace is what reminds me of the reality of Aradamis. Am I really part of the ocean? Am I part of them? I will never know until my next encounter with Aradamis. Is he real? Was the kiss a sense of my delusional past or was it truly magical? I will never know. 

As I walk home, both my earthly guardians were behind me all this while witnessing that enchanting episode. Mother was sobbing with so much joy and tears and said this to me,

"I was about to tell you when you're ready, but I didn't know they'd come sooner than I expected."

Father said,

"We know you are very special, but we didn't expect them to come so soon."

With a big smile, I assured them that I won't be going anywhere because nothing beats the love and care the have given me. That kiss tells me much more than I need. I know now who loves me more and how their love has brought me up with so much respect of the care that they've been giving.

My time with the dock will now end because I know now the truth that Aradamis has given to me. As for Aradamis, I will treasure that special encounter with awe and wonder. I will call for him again soon but not now. 

Now, is the time for me to love my cute little parents who brought me up with so much tender loving care. That 19 years is what I've considered truly magical to me.

Tomorrow

Photo Credit: Waynn Images

The morning has come when I have to face what I fear most. It was a new day, a new change. I remembered I was told by him that he is no longer having the same feeling for me back when how we've started. I still remember vividly how he tells me he was through with me during dinner time at his place.

I knew this was coming and I was so downcast that it was this soon. Again, I refrain from arguing with him because I do not see the point in it anymore. All I ever asked was,

"Is he good to you?" I asked sincerely.

His answer to me was cold and harsh,

"That, is no longer your concern. Anymore."

It hurts so much just to hear those words directly from him as the receiving end because I know my care for him have already been taken advantage of. I am just history to him.

I remember he used to yearn and beg for care when he needed it. He would usually asked for more when I was never ready. He will asks for things he think he wants and I'll be sacrificing all of those for him with no questions asked. Truthfully, I am a bore to him.

Now, I know he doesn't need me anymore.

He has been cheating on me ever since I can remember. I know but I never wanted to confront. He has been secretly texting a guy whom I've not met mutually. In retrospect, I'm being too complacent with our relationship, he dominates the entire relationship by meeting all his wants from me.

I do not demand for love like how he does it.

I do not beg for attention like how he asks for it.

I do not practice materialism like how he splurge it.

Surprisingly, what I'm going to miss most is, is his enthusiasm for life. He is always eager to try new things which brought colors to my life. He made me see things in so many different perspectives which no one I know is able to pull such energized stunt in a courtship.

It was 8.06pm and the feeling I had is not sadness. It's a feeling that I am over staying my welcome the minute he asked me to let him go. So, I asked emotionlessly,

"Are you expecting someone? I can pack all my stuff and you can see the last of me from today onwards."

"You don't have to be like that. Why do you always have to talk like that? There will be no one else coming to my place at all. Don't always sound like a know-it-all!" He sounded really defensive.

"Then I guess I'll pack then." I stood up, I know him too well.

"Damn it, Malcolm! Why do you always have to see through me?" He demanded. 

I closed my eyes and inhale a deep breath. Then I looked at him as I exhale,

"You tend to lie every time you want things your way. What makes this lie anymore different than the rest in which you have done before?"

"Then I suggest that you stay. Just to prove my innocence that no one will be coming." He fidget with his fingers around his cell phone. He never changes, he's betting on either his pride, ego or maybe himself.

"There is no need to prove anything. Not to me. I will just pack my stuff and leave. It is painful for me to even stay on here when clearly you do not want me to be around." I quietly move to his room and started packing.

*Door Bells Ring*. 

Just about time that I finished packing, and for some odd reason, he looks really pale.

He wasn't ready I suppose. As I walked out, he was trying to justify his actions again as he walks by to open the door. And here comes that person whom I've been longing to see.

His new lover.

"Oh hi! You must be..." He squinted his eyes and he was puzzled.

"Hi sir, I'm the help. I'm just trying to clean up the mess as soon as possible so that you two are able to enjoy the evening together." I interrupted abruptly when I noticed my ex-boyfriend's facial expressions.

"Wonderful! Honey, you didn't tell me you hired the help to clean up the house!" He was smiling towards my ex-lover with glittering eyes. "You always know how to surprise me even more, like everyday."

I've packed up my stuff and said to them,

"It's been a pleasure, sirs. Allow me to wish you both a happy evening together. I have to take these out."

"Thank you!!!" His new lover exclaimed.

I closed that door behind me. I wanted to cry so bad. And I heard him say,

"I forgot to pay him."

I quickly wiped off that little emotional tears that I shed and stand confidently outside waiting for the lift. He came running towards my direction and said,

"You didn't have to do that just now. You shouldn't have..."

"Goodbye, Justin. It's been a real pleasure knowing you. I will now move on with mine. And I hope we can still be friends even if we didn't work out as lovers." I hugged him. It was our last hug. A real hug. 

He is now officially my history.

"Friends. Definitely." He uttered with guilt.

Now, all of these seems like yesterday when I actually saw him walking towards my direction with a different partner again. The break seems like yesterday, but it feels like last week? Or was it last month? Has it been longer than that? Ha! I can't even remember how long was it anymore. He is no longer my pain. I have forgotten many of the events that he and I were together.

He was my lesson learned. He is my friend still because after all, he did smile at me while he passes me by. He is what made me new again. And by him making that decision to let me go, I have met my loving husband of 3 years and more (hopefully).

Tomorrow will always be a better day for me. Tomorrow is what I will always look forward for.

Tomorrow.